Such beauty most glorious

Such beauty most glorious
Is found only in you
For it only is pure
And true

It's tenderness tingles
Every hair stands on end
When it finds such solace
Such comfort
In its true friend

None other is faithful
Yet when it is found
Such joy within
Doth abound

And it is wondrous
To behold such benevolence
It gushes out of all who find it
For it cannot be contained

It surely is an untamed thing
Yet for those who know it
It doth splendorous satisfaction bring

Yea all beauty is bound
In the creator of it
For the thing is but a small taste
Of the thing which bore it
With such love and care

Tis glorious and good
When the thing which was created
Leaps for joy in discovery
Of its long lost love
Found in the one
Who did bring it life

-Joshua Lee Foist

So strip away the sorrow and the sadness

So strip away the sorrow and the sadness
Fill this down trodden heart with gladness
For the days that have been
And the days that are to come
May each one
Spring forth with joy

Whether in wealth
Or in rags
May these eyes
Look toward the light
That shines through
May it always and only
Seek after you

Strip away the pride
That is held inside
The ugliness and the pain
All that is bitter
May it no more remain

So scatter these thoughts
That would linger
On what is not possessed
Or purchased
For all that is desired
In this flawed world of man
Will soon decay
And drift away
And turn to dust and clay

May these eyes not look with envy
Or lust in this loneliness
For what is not pure and holy
May they seek thee solely
And fully in all that can be sought

And comfort this heart
May it be content
In the one who was sent
And find all that is ever needed
In this perfect one

For truly all others will
Soon fade away
What beauty is found today
Will soon wash away

And may this life
Seek to be lost
In the one
Who can find it

And love
In the way it was intended
Completely and perfectly
With no strings attached
Despite the wrong that is done
So will it
Love on

And so may this love inspire
That which is within this wretched spirit
May it learn to love in kind
Not only the one who loves
But also those whom love
Will never know

For there's is a cruel path
And they seek only to snatch
What joy is found in others
They seek to quench
The love that remains
True and pure
In these few forgotten souls

Yet toil not to think on them
For indeed they will find their judgment
Surely and swiftly
On a day they will not know

Yet think not on these things
But rather reflect on the goodness
That hath been shown thee
And rest in the knowledge
That thee are truly loved
More richly and abundantly
Than thee will ever
Truly know

And so rest in this assurance
Yes, rest
And love with a pure and holy love
As thee have been shown
That those round may know
The hope of which thee have

Yea may they seek it
And find it
That they too
May find what is
Right and True

-Joshua Lee Foist

I tire of this facade

I tire of this facade
When shall I venture
To toss this mask
Of trite association

Where lies the destination
From here
Though loneliness I fear
Tis in loneliness 
I find my solace

All is quiet here
None do torment
But the demons in my head
And I allow them to tread
Within 

In this drunken release
I find a false feeling of peace
It tortures and strips me
Of all dignity 

What discontent is in me
I am lost in a flawed sense
Of reality

I seek too much
In the "goodness" of man
Tis all lost in striving
For whatever I can

And still tis far from enough
I am wrapped up in the stuff
The cords of desire
Wrap tighter and tighter

And no one satisfies
Not one is good

Why then am I surprised
When this jealousy in me doth arise
I pray your joy might enter my heart
And bring comfort to my soul

-Joshua Lee Foist
 

I am all of jealousy and rage

I am all of jealousy and rage
My soul is caught in sorrow and bitterness 
Selfish and unsatisfied
My pride tis all in which I confide

All round me I see it, I feel it
Others dreams others joy
But none rests within me

Why can't I rejoice in others happiness 
Why must I rage in my own discontent 
I am all undone, outstretched, and miserable

Wishing to understand
Wanting to be understood 
For this whoever I am

Can't recall anymore 
For oft in me
This me I adore
And this me I abhor

Where lies release
Is there still hope
That peace may find in me
Pure joy untainted 

Where might the dawn break
Ist still there courage in me to awake
That will stand up and fight
Despite the weight of it all

Will this love I know
Ne'er oft truly show
Bring life and refreshment
To my soul

I long to find contentment
I eagerly await thy pleasant presence
To fill me

How shall I love
When all I feel is rage
When bitterness and envy
War within this cage

I long to fly from this place
To find some respite
Yet where

Only you are there
In this heartbeat 
In this prayer
Bring hope 
Amidst my despair

Repair this heart that is broken
When all lies as waste before me
So bring love and joy
And a peace that will satisfy

When all within me is
Sin and shame
I pray I may find favor
And rest in thy holy
And fearsome name

-Joshua Lee Foist

Ah, sweet melodies that softly wake this morn

Ah, sweet melodies that softly wake this morn
How richly thy welcome adorns
And how my heart within me doth sigh
In stillness oft in me is sadness (why?)

Tis always such sorrow in the quiet
In the early morn or late eve of night
Oh, what tumult rages within me
Am I soft with envy

Or tis deeper still
This lonesome will
Hath pride taken me
To a sea of longing

How far must I wade through these waters
Is the bottom near beside
Must these currents drag me to the undertow
Who can know

The cold of winter brings a chill
And at times a bitterness
Oh to return to the joy of the season
Despite all the world around
Who hath stolen it away

With their toys and trinkets
In them is no joy to behold
For in time they too grow old

But this brokenness can be made whole
If one will but humbly come
To Him who heals the deaf and dumb
For He is the joy of the season

Tis He who has brought light
And life to all man
To them who believe
It is He who
Calms the fears
That plague one
Through the years

Peace is found
In this Prince
And King
Hope is awakened
Forgiveness is found
In this perfect and holy
Son of God

-Joshua Lee Foist

What confused and conflicted heart doth beat in me

What confused and conflicted heart doth beat in me
All seems dull and void of joy and happiness
How oft in stillness, I grow impatient and proud
I wrap myself in this angry shroud
This melancholy

This tension in me doth take its toll
It increases with every passing breath
More and more it steals from me
The life I once loved

Sorrow slowly settles in
And I wait for the dark of night
To cover me in my sin
Tis the only comfort I find within

Though all tis folly
To think I remain unseen
The thought tis pleasant
I wish at times in this place
None would remain to toil with me

Yet tis pride in me that truly desires release
And it brings with it no profound peace
Oh what joy can be found in such a wretched soul
Is there but hope that remains for such as me
What favor could one find
When one is but near to losing all sanity of mind

Is there one who would share this pain
Is there one who might remove such a burden
It bares deep upon me
The weight of it is too much to bear
And all strength in me is gone

What help can come to me
What life remains
Seems worthless and wasted

Is there but a chance
That this broken heart may ever
Be whole again

The love of man
Is selfish and deceitful
It abuses and confuses
To satisfy its own desires

Tis more of lust than love
It rapes what worth remains
It steals and stains
And what remains is refuse and rot
And all but forgot

Yet there is one
Who remains
Who can heal
And restore

One who loves perfectly
And unselfishly
His love is true
His love is for all
Who cry out in shame
In the midst of the brokenness and pain
They call upon His name

In the darkest of night
In the greatest peril of the fight
There remains this one
This resurrected Son of God
Tis He who bore all sin
Found in the world of men

And He alone can free one
From these chains
Freedom is found
In He
Who has set the captives free
For all eternity!

-Joshua Lee Foist

In this early morned sight

In this early morned sight
My wondering thoughts take flight
Where will this dawn of day unfold
What might these early rays of light inspire

As I gaze past thy fiery splendor
My thoughts drift back to those days I remember
Days past this december day
Back when that autumn rust
Shone bright and fair

Now wonder I if I should care
Where such days have taken me
All seem entwined in mere simplicity
And so am I caught in its duplicity

Oh, fairest, faint, fluttering past
Those days it seemed might ever last
Now time hath quickly snatched them from me
Yea I walk now only in their memory

Perchance another day may bring
Another joyful song to sing
But till that day arise
I shall settle in
This wintered waste
And wait until
Thy fond reprise

-Joshua Lee Foist

Let not this idle tongue lead thee astray

Let not this idle tongue lead thee astray
When little rest is in thee
And this anxious day
Do not throw thy words so carelessly away

For oft they will mislead
They will cut deep
Beneath thy sorrowful state
Let not thy words breed hate

May self control be thy ally
It may keep thee
From losing thy company

For words oft potent prove
What lies within
Whether good or sin

Speak thee cautious
And tender
That thy words thee remember
May be tasteful and true

May they speak well of you
As they descend like drops of dew
May they refresh and restore

That they may give life
To those without
And bring comfort
To those in doubt

So may thy words
Ever and oft be about

-Joshua Lee Foist

Let us then love

Let us then love
When the world around us
Will none of it pursue
Let us then love
When all around
Is hatred and envy
Let us then love
As so we should desire

Let us then love
When all around is war and rage
Engrossed in the folly of the age
Let us then love
When all wrong is polluted
Diluted and appear to be right
Let us then love
As is pleasing in thy sight

Let us then love
When others may curse
Or rob us (or worse)
Let us then love
Despite all rational reason
With humility and honor
Let us then love
As our father above

Let us then love
All the more
As the days are evil
Let us then love
Beyond all boundaries and creeds
With a purpose that bleeds
Let us then love
That the truth may enlighten
And for some frighten
Yet soften all that is wrought in wicked and wrong
Yes, let us then love
And love on with all courage and joy

-Joshua Lee Foist

So comes december softly and still

So comes december softly and still
These days we'll remember if only awhile
Soon other arrivals will engage us
Still all the while you entertain us

This winter chill may in time
Be a pleasantness to feel
But for the moment
It seems as the dread
Of these hectic days ahead

Once was thought to be a holiday
And holy indeed was in meant to be
But now the days grow short
And our patience too has seemed to find
Its breaking point

But may we still amidst the worries we wear
Find some since of purpose to bear
May we strive for joy
No matter what trials ahead may employ

For these days are holy
And few
So may we live them
With fullness and fellowship too

May we love outside our physical means
And live our lives in love and peace
Yes hope beyond the hope we have
In faith we'll find our final rest

-Joshua Lee Foist

You awaken in me new life

You awaken in me new life
And calm all sorrows and all strife
You cut through the darkness within
And bring in the light

Its warmth surrounds and heals
The wounds within my soul
I feed on its tender touch
That comforts my aching heart

This love I never knew
Is only found here with you
Draw me to you and never let me go
My one and only desire is here
By your side

Eagerly I await
When we shall meet again
Once more
I feel your warmth
Upon the waters
Within the sun that is rising

Upon the wind
Or in the rain
That washes away the pain
In the ominous fog
Which settles down upon the earth

I am captured in its majestic array
Here in this still and quiet
You steal me away
Before the waking of the day

Here I come to listen and to pray
You draw me in
With you beauty
With your grace
For here tis heaven
And embrace
I shall cling to you

For what storms
Can take me from this place
What mountain or wave
Can take me from your love

No shadow or season
Bares reason
To remain
If not for you
Who know them all
By name

So here I shall stay
Though all the world
May waste away
Still here I shall remain
Till my life is void
And I am caught up in
Your currents
Which draw me
Deeper and deeper within
To your heavenly shores
Where I shall at last
Rest and remain ever by your side

-Joshua Lee Foist

The road which lies ahead before me

The road which lies ahead before me
This path untread where no footprints hath led
All is full of wide imaginings
Such wonder and expectation
The great destination unknown
And this only the beginning

Where shall I journey out from this place
Where might I wander but a step to the left or right
Soon all origin is out of sight
And what lies ahead is sheer delight

This winding path
Where might it lead
Shall I journey far and wide
Across this vast countryside

Ah, tis pleasant here
By this bubbling brook
To look beneath thy depths below
How thy belly doth seem to grow
On and on without end

Lost in eternity
Tis a life worth living
Where time is timeless
Yet full of meaning

Here might I stay a moment
Or a year
What's to fear
To stay awhile
And watch these currents collide
Across to the other side

Tis beauty there
Upon thy banks
Spread open wide
They beckon me to their side

And I think I shall let them
Carry me in to shore
Where I shall get to know thee
A little more

Tis here that I adore
Here where life is growing
All around

This journey is bound to be full
Filled with endless possibilities
I cannot describe or here imagine
How it may begin
Or where it shall lead

But I do know
That it shall surely be
Worth all of eternity
To rest here in this place
Here and now

To be here
Among such beauty and grace
To journey into that kingdom
Just across the eastern shore

Moment of moment
And day of day
Doth beckon me away
To its wondrous shore

Tis there I shall journey
A little more
Deeper and deeper in
I journey
Farther than the moment before

I cannot keep away
For I long for it more and more
Each passing moment
Of every day

Tis there that life
Was meant to be lived
Freely and full
Without thought
Or self control

Rest is found
In these rich
Refreshing lands

Tis here where life began
And tis here it shall ever be
Throughout all of time
And all eternity

-Joshua Lee Foist

Come now ye autumn sun

Come now ye autumn sun
Shine down on everyone
Flutter and fall upon
These dying leaves

And grant them rest
As they descend
Down trunk and barren branch

Glow as thee wither away
From golden to amber
And umber
Thee under this tenebrous tree

So settle thee in
The earth again
And cease thy sorrow
Come peace tomorrow

For here thee lie
Awhile a day
Upon the ground
Here ever to stay

-Joshua Lee Foist

Now to the dawn

Now to the dawn
Before it descends upon
The break of day

So sweet and soft
Thee flutter aloft
Before thy colors awake

Stillness shades
These grassy blades
Before dispensing its dew

So silence reigneth over you
With all reverence
Reserved in thy presence

The dawn doth adorn
In the early morn
And wash thee in its rainbow showers

Soft and still
It soothes thy solace
And slowly settles in

Drink in the dawn
Before its gone
To day (it steals away)

So in the early morning hours
Rest in thy glorious streams and showers
As thee wake the day
With thy splendorous array

-Joshua Lee Foist

Come to me by evening light

Come to me by evening light
And you may find some rare delight
Yet come to me in early morn
And then I fear you'll find my scorn

Engage the night while still tis born
And forget the morn
From which I was torn

Linger not long
That thee might wake the dawn
For yet again thee shall invoke all wrong

And wrath in me
Tis a bitter eternity
From which all men should flee

These moments are few
That I spend with you
Though they too
Make their do

So when thee come
If thee come
Tell not everyone

But come in the early eve of night
And there all wrong in me 
Shall be made right

For you may find yet still
Some trace of delight
While still remains
It the eve of night

- Joshua Lee Foist  

Frustrations, they take their tole

Frustrations, they take their tole
And all too oft I must play the role
Of competent, though in truth I am
Rather cold and callous

Here I linger in my palace of rage
Waiting for that lonely age
Where all will bend to my will
Yet still I am discontent

I am outstretched and worn
Restless and torn
From all humanity
In my quiet insanity
I bleed out all of self desire
For what remains I must retire

For they conspire against me
And truly are my enemy
I long to get away
For even a moment or a day

To find that quiet place
Where one can respite
In peace and find a remnant
Of grace

Though at times I fear
I may never again
See thy face
All I remember
Is but a trace

And soon tis lost
In this waste

Oh take me from this place
To a world yet born
Where beauty and grace
May thee yet still adorn

For here I remain
To weep and to morn
But thy kingdom of hope
Is the only rope
Which may save
And pull me from this plague

I need thee
In this hour
Surround me in thy shower
That I may feel the rain
Wash away all the doubt and pain

Such pleasant washing
I long to be cleansed
Of all fear and failure
That in time
I may come to thy gate
Rich and full
And resting
In thy tender
Embracing
Unending
Care

-Joshua Lee Foist

Now November hath remembered

Now November hath remembered
And returned yet once more
I oft enjoy thy seasoned stay
Though thee remain
At most a month

I find thy entrance
Most alluring
As thee add an hour
Upon thy morning break

As if for heaven's sake
To give thy company
An extended rest
Before they awake
Or dawn doth break

So descends thy starry host
And makes its boast
Upon the eve of dawn
And slowly passes on
What remains of fall
Within thy seasoned hall

Thy colors so rich
Thy beauty beyond compare
I oft love to stop and stare (awhile)
Perchance I shall not behold thee
Within a second glance

And so my softened eyes
Dance round thy pleasant skies
And drink in thy charms
As if to hold within these arms
A little while
Thy tender grace and style

Yea shall I embrace
Thy rosy colors
Full and fluttering
Round thy amber gates

For beyond in darkness
Slowly waits
The fall of autumn
And the wasting away
Of the winter day

Yet before
We close that solemn door
Let us journey still
Awhile more

May we rejoice
In thy beauty rich
Which thee generously
Do employ

So seasoned with thy joy
I shall remain awhile
Within to indulge
In thy glorious array
While still tis called
Today

Joshua Lee Foist

So often changeth

So often changeth
These many desires
In me I have sought

Yet thee
Ever remaineth
Thee changeth not

So am I caught
Between the spirit
And what I want

My desires often
Fade from one passing moment
To the next which is but here
And then surely gone

Such waste
These precious few hours
Polluted in pride and petty perfection
Which can never achieve
All that I hope and believe
Tis wasted
For this instant satisfaction

Indeed it too
Hath near but lost
All attraction

And now addiction
Hath taken me
With its affliction

And I am bound too it
By pure fear and submission
It hath cost me that

Oh, to be free
To follow after
That which I once knew
Was faithful and true

Did cost me little
And much
Yet gave me
Everything

All desire
Satisfied
Fully

And found
In faith
Within that one
Who restores
And renews
All joy
And longing
To its proper
Place

So the soul
May at last
Rest
At peace
Within
That sweet
Heavenly
Grace

-Joshua Lee Foist

So sit I here intently and still

So sit I here intently and still
Gazing into what my heart longs to feel
This touch, this ache
And panic in me doth hesitate

For I approximate
What desire in me
Cannot fully create
I linger in this pool
Where pleasures
Are but tattered treasures
Void of their value and virtue

Once this rose did bud and blossom
But now tis torn
By its thorn
Forgotten and forlorn

In these quiet moments
My heart doth soften
And shed all this doubt
And delusion
From callous and confusion
And long for some conclusion
Some hope that may lie ahead

Where to these waters
I can tread
Where I can quench
The thirst within
It doth beckon me
With its sweet savory substance

To come take my fill
To be full
And satisfied
Forever in its drink

May this heart
Oft diluted
By the dismal decay
Of the day
Come quickly away
And seek for that
Which will not
Pass away

Yes rush
To those streams
Where one's broken dreams
Are reborn
Where all longing
Finds release
As it rests
In this quiet peace
Here beside these
Reviving waters

-Joshua Lee Foist

Now for the day that is to be

Now for the day that is to be
Who can know where it shall take me
While anxiety and sleep depravity
Strive to take control

I wonder oft how I shall play my roll
Whether calm or loud
Shall I linger in this shroud
That separates me from all social interaction

Shall I give it full satisfaction
Or shall I step out among the bright lights
And perform my part
I know by heart
Though none is in me
But depravity

Why reveal such scars
Would not it bring more distance
Surely they too share this sickness
Yet few will seek comfort in
The company around
Within they hide
Underground
Denied of all human
Influence

Yet humanity hath already taken its course
Its influence hath led one to this place
Here lies the depth of its disparity
Where it hath lost all hope in charity

Oh to find
An oasis of longing
Where all is revealed
And nothing concealed
All is seen for what it has been
And what it has become

Yet it denies
No one
All are welcome to come
And drink from its source

-Joshua Lee Foist

So strayed my heart for a season of hope

So strayed my heart for a season of hope
Seeking after that which seemed to satisfy
Yet twas ill invested
And this congestion and callus grew
A season or two

Till at last it too was past
And when I think upon
Those "wasted" moments
I think "my God"
What am I seeking

If not for you
All that I pursue
Would crumble and fall
So passions succumb to sin
And plague me deep within
While I terry here awhile
And hope I may find release

Yet always it ends without peace
Instead more dread in me tis fed
By this wasted investment

If indeed this hope must grow
Then I plead once more
"Oh God" do not let go
For even as it hurts so
I know that all is but shedding
And wasting away
As I draw closer (I pray) to thee
More earnestly
Than the days before

And so as I journey on
From this season
I shan't forget the reason
For which I came
Or my crime of which I am to blame

Tis all in learning to trust
As He indeed is just
And willing to forgive
So may I all the more
With thankfulness live
For the one
Who has given His son
To show His love

In part, He hath given His heart
And shown His glorious work of art
In death conquered
And life reborn
So has He calmed the storm
Of sin that so long
Hath raged within
And brought us home
At last to Him

-Joshua Lee Foist

Time, how thee steadily move on

Time, how thee steadily move on
Whether I wait for thee
Or keep in motion
Thy notion remains
Continuous

I cannot beg or plead
That thee return
To what was
Only now what is
While still it is here

And a moment (I fear)
And it too is a year
Since last twas here

So time
Whether acknowledged
Or no
Thee continue
And shall remain
Unchanged

May I then
Learn from thee
How to use what time
That I am given

For I cannot keep thee
Thee move as easily
As oil in the hand
And more freely still

None has the will
Save thy creator
And none can cease

So, indeed
May we invest
In these precious
Few moments

That we may be blessed
With moments
We cherish

And may we not despair
When such seasons
Disappear

For all things
Have a beginning
And end

And who can know
When this moment too
Shall end

-Joshua Lee Foist

And so I must depart

And so I must depart
And leave behind all longings of the heart
Nature hath taken its course
And so I shall seek its source

I journey outward
Into the great expanse
Not knowing where I shall go
Or how long I must remain
In this trance

Yet steadily on
I advance
With great courage
And with all joy
I can employ

The great unknown
Is far too wondrous
And mysterious for words

Yet glorious lies the view ahead
Unlike any other land I have tread
The sea is wild and the journey treacherous
But there's no turning back

Always looking ahead
For there the journey shall end
And there the journey shall begin

What troubles may lie ahead
Who can know
Still steadily on we go
Engaging this course

With all speed
And all strength
We heed to the calling
From which none shall return
Yet all the while our heart's burn

Awaiting this glorious voyage
Into such uncharted waters
Where no eye hath seen
Nor any other hath been

We journey home
To that place
Which all our lives have longed
To live within those gates

Where the gardens grow wild
And the currents are strong
And all streams converge
At it's source

The source of all life
Tis here, our journey's end
When we have truly come home
To our one and greatest friend

-Joshua Lee Foist

I did reason with love for a season

I did reason with love for a season
Did share my strivings and struggles
Still it did so steadfastly
Love on
Without a thought or care

Such love so rare
With none couldst I compare
Nor comprehend
How I was so privy to such a friend
None had I known
So faithful and true

"Love," inquired I
"Why dost thou love
Such imperfection as I
What hath thou to gain
From such a pursuit"

Love replied
Without hesitation
"Twas for thy own sake
This bond of affection
I did stake"

"I do not love for my own gain
For I need not love to remain
For such love I give
For indeed Love I am
There is no love
To compare to mine"

"My love is complete
I love all
Whether in despair
Or without a care
My love exceeds all
Boundaries"

"So accept as thou wilt
My love without guilt
No "good" could thee do
To merit my love
For you"

"My love is true
My love is pure
It is the only cure
For all else is counterfeit
And will not satisfy"

"But my love remains
It bears all stains
And sorrows that one bares
In my love
One casts their cares
Upon"

And so breaks the dawn
Of hope
And what lies beyond
Indescribable
And too wonderful
For words

-Joshua Lee Foist

Why so oft do I seek such solitude and seclusion

Why so oft do I seek such solitude and seclusion
When ere I spend mere moments among stranged folk
Ist not I that art more strange than they
For though in my eyes they appear more common
I am more to them (I imagine) an exhibit at the zoo

Lost in the lonely hours
Where dismal days are all a maze
I venture here or there
For hours of years
And venture out again
When ere the dawn hath broke
Or twilight doth take

Once again, fair friend
We embark upon another day
And this one I pray
May be more of joy
Than the day before

Still sorrow doth seep in once more
And knocks at my door
As oft I engage it

So much I give of time these days
I wonder tis selfish for a season of silence
When moment to moment
I rush in or rush out
Ist too much to ask
Not to converse about

Some are given to speech
Whenever others are near
Yet when this is one's profession
One's work (one's obsession)
Tis tiresome to engage in
At the end of the day

Too engage in the mindless melodies
That meander their way
Throughout the moments of the day
I find more restful
Than talk or play

True in its own
Tis not a terrible trait
At least not all the time
At any rate

Perhaps tis fate
I did fall to this trade
For which I am
All too often little paid

Other professions
Surely have their obsessions
Though perhaps more subtle than this

I do care for those
Whether common or rare
Tis just not always
I like to share

And whether to be known
Or not known by name
I wish at least
To be known
As fellow
As friend

-Joshua Lee Foist

On washing

Thou doth stink
There is no other way
In which to say it
I think

And I speak not of character
Nor class
Save that thou lacks
The necessity
Of common class

When thy entrance was first made
Didst near but clear a room
With thy lack of groom

Twas it too much work
To cleanse thy form
For thy own sake
When thou didst awake

Nay, I fear
Tis more of concern
To spend thy time
Toping thy thirst of whiskey or wine
Or relishing in the wisps of smoke
That from thy pipe evoke

I fear if I did embalm thee
With some sent of sweetness
Thy toxins might repel
Such sweetness with thy smell

I can no further gift thee give
Than this request
That thou return
Well rested
And washed

-Joshua Lee Foist

And now in this tainted moment of truth

And now in this tainted moment of truth
I look round me for some reason some proof
That all that is felt whether in depth or in shallow
Hath substance and meaning no matter one's doubt

Hear one's story whether faint or load
All are moments of passing
Where beating and breathing abound

The feeling is numb
The mind is clouded and caught
Yet this too is not without meaning

All are passing
Coming and going
Whether revealed or concealed
Life is in living and breathing
The passing of time
In a heart that is beating

Pain that is felt
Whether distant or near
Can anyone acknowledge or bear

Here's proof within the pondering
No mind is but wandering
Tis always at work
Until the work is done

Though doubt may often
Fill one and consume much
Nothing can hide this simple truth
Tis blessed those who live
And give without end
For in this doth one find
The fairest of friend

In this whether in parting or greeting
Doth one find all of life hath meaning
Yea all of life
Is bound in a single breath

-Joshua Lee Foist

I was lost in the busyness of work and study

I was lost in the busyness of work and study
When I at first heard the news - all was not well
Though many a thought in me did swell
I could not linger on it long
For I had other things to reflect on

Though its anxiety grew in me still
I could not manage the courage to will
This thing from my thoughts
Too close and too dear
Emotions ran deep
And my heart did fear

Could the moment be near
For it was but a year or more past
When all was well
How my heart longed it would be so again
I could not ponder or begin
To think on what may lie ahead

I was selfish and in denial
And I let it fill me awhile
It was only a dream
Soon would I wake
And all would be as it had been before
Before the news had broke

Yet then as I awoke
I knew it was indeed true
And I prayed to God he would give me
The courage and strength to make it through

And for those whom I dearly love
Who were attending to his care
I did offer up my prayer
"Great God be merciful
For indeed all things are in your control"

And so must I trust
What ere the future may hold
That His will is best
We all have much been blessed
By this dear man of faith

Where ere the road ahead may lead
We know without a doubt
It will lead us closer
To the one above
Who looks down with love
Upon all who are his own

-Joshua Lee Foist

Ah, for the days that are to come

Ah, for the days that are to come
And for the day that is to be begun
All stand as one
What is and what remains to be done

What ere we become
In what remains
Who can say

But as one embarks on this day
In heart and mind may pray
That one should not be impatient
Of delay or any other such way

Here is a season
And with it good reason
To remain in this place and time
In this there is much to gain

So do not hastily wish
As to dismiss
This

Here shall thee stay
As long as thee may
Hope not for another day
But hope to make the most of it
So much as you can

There's good here to be found
And little chance you shall return
From this of which you should learn

So learn all that you may
While it is still called today
Learn all that these moments
May convey

And in time
When other pleasures may arise
And their joys may dampen your eyes
Look back with some reflection
To those former days with great affection

For here in have thee learned the lesson
Of what is gained with some correction
Some knowledge and wisdom is found
In the heart of one who is patient

One cannot hope to enjoy
Without also some trials to employ
But when they are past
One can rest in the knowledge
That some joys were made to ever last

-Joshua Lee Foist

He is but a man

He is but a man
That the world doth seem to adore
Yet he is nothing more

Yes in life he made for himself a name
And did oft but dress as a dame
And dance to all fame

Ah, but a famous name
And nothing more
So will you still adore

Is he a god
That you should pay respect
Hardly (though it seems rather odd)

When one is dead
Their past sins are oft forgot
And we praise what one is not
As if they were a god

We all are but man
But dust and death
To become

And so we are dumb
To think it more than so
We have but seventy or eighty

And then tis done
Do not forget
We all are but human after all

So as we may praise
The "glories" of man
May we not forget
That he too is mortal

And holds no claim
Beyond the title of fame
When he is gone

He will to heaven or hell
So well as anyone
And no mark of his deeds
Will dismiss him so

Only but the grace of God
Can save him
His sin

-Joshua Lee Foist

Ah, these summer days

Ah, these summer days
Do seem less a thrill
Than those remembered before

This blazing heat
Doth take some tolerance
To appreciate

And still it bakes
Whether in morn or eve
It awakes

Ah, that all the world were a bit cooler
Such refreshment
Might make it all more pleasant

I have seen places where the summer days
Are glorious full of blues and grays
There is a soft sweet breeze
That blows down to one's knees

Yes, I remember these
Oft when I am in such a mood
I do not wish to be rude with my grumbling

I s'pose tis natural
When one knows of something else
Tis hard to accept

One often thinks
'But last summer twas not like this
There were beaches full of bathing and bliss'

Yet all is now too hot
And hath turned to rot
And this I care not
So it seems we must enclose our company
And look out from our window panes
And await the autumn rains

For in time twill be cooler
And the days more full
Of life outside
This despaired place

-Joshua Lee Foist

Now to ill choice

Now to ill choice
I will give here some voice
How oft you plague me
With thy insistent pleas

Yet you care little for the rest
Only it is enough you are impressed
And yet that too is short lived
You move on to the next

What am I to do with you
Your ways are too costly
And you are far too bossy
I will thee no more amuse

Though let these words not confuse
I do care for thee as I do myself
But you must learn some sense
To be patient and grateful

If all is so quickly devoured
How will you know what you like
You like to have
Yet you have not the decency to share

You must learn little one
A bit more to care
Also for the needs of others
All is not your own

Twas bought at a great and costly price
I ask that you would heed this advice
And learn to be more generous
As you have been lavished upon so generously

You have much
And you do not see
All around is poverty
Begging for but a scrap of bread

And you've much more than this
Can you not learn to give
To share with those
Who have not

I pray that in time you will
Grow more kind
And be satisfied
In those who love

May you be content
In the one above
For indeed
Tis He who has given
The mostly costly gift
Of all

-Joshua Lee Foist

So quickly the days go by

So quickly the days go by
So swiftly the seasons fly
From June to July
From summer to autumn
And autumn to winter

A splinter in time
No thicker than a dime
Yet more costly still
We are caught in its thrill
We are lost in its will

Yet will we remember
When it has past
How it was spent
Will we with joy
Recall
Those early days
Of Fall

Or will hurry
To fill another glass
That we may not ponder
Alas, we think
Upon that which we did
Too hastily drink

It cannot be undrunk
Its poison hath already
Begun its work
Slowly the years
Turn to months
To days and hours

Brief moments at best
So shall they be spent
In one spontaneous event
Or will we slowly savor
Each sip
For all it may hold

Till the days grow old
And the light grows dimmer
Will we remember
In those remaining hours
How we spent our days

Was it invested
In worldly recognition
And praise
Or was it founded
On something
Beyond this world
Beyond the pages of this book

When its story is complete
Will we find we are but
One of many
Lost in a repository
Of reminiscent
Origin

To at last discover
What lies beyond its cover
The author of each work
Each line of literature
Written by his hand

Which crafted so beautifully
Each work of art
And adorned it with
An emblem
Of his heart

Here lie the most
Cherished of all
His works
That are seated
In His Great Hall

-Joshua Lee Foist

Ah, to reminisce upon this

Ah, to reminisce upon this
This quiet moment
To ponder and to pray
Upon rays of the early day

Morning has broke
Yet sorrow in me doth choke
As I gasp in the splendor
Yet not oft enough do I surrender

So I remain
As I am in this panic
Frozen in time
Steadily engaging my crime

All too often to return
How I yearn to grow
To change
To know what purpose
Lies ahead

But just a glance
A moment from this
Could be sorrow or bliss
Must it all be based on
The end result

If not all joy
Will I revolt
And engage my fancy
My facade
My only god

So caught up
In this trance
Lost in the emotion
Drunk on the latest truth

But satisfaction
Is a season
A destination
Without reason

And this too in time
Will pass
All alas is gone
For a moment
Of bliss

All at once again
I reminisce
And remember this
Lost in sin
It beckons me in

Into its chambers
Of darkness
And pain
Where I am ravaged again
And thrown out
Without remorse

So has it taken its course
Within me
But I cannot remain here
This faint flicker
Of hope

Deep down I know it well
It remains
It reminds me
Of a joy I once knew

A longing I had
For you
Will such a hope
A fervency
Renew

I pray it will
That despite
All betrayal
In me
Your love will
Prevail

And somehow
It will release
From me this pain
That I may find
Joy again
In you

-Joshua Lee Foist

Sunlight brushes breathlessly over the horizon

Sunlight brushes breathlessly over the horizon
Drop by drop it descends down the mountainside
Slowly yet steadily it fills this void of darkness
Quickly consuming all blackness that stands in its way

So breaks the dawn into the day
And so steals away the dark to the light
No more stars and no more night
The day has broken with the morning light

Oh come and wrap yourself in its warmth
Let it soak through your skin and warm you within
Gone is the cold of night
Now full the day and bright

So begins the day
And such a glorious one
The beautiful colorful rays of the sun
Shining down upon everyone

-Joshua Lee Foist

A chance at meeting

A chance at meeting
This heart that is beating
Wondering still
Wondering will

Maybe twill be
Maybe we'll see
Yet life is still
A mystery

Not one moment can be seen for sure
Not one moment than before
Waiting with anticipation
Waking with surprise
As you open your eyes
To some glorious realization
It could be

Why toss it aside
For chance
Or romance
Ah, a distant glance
And let it go
It's all for show
They'll never know

Don't hide beneath
Your riddles and rhyme
There's always time
To reminisce
Don't forget this

All moments are new
And this much is true
They'll always hold
As precious gold
Your glory inside

For twas you who made
Such emotions as pride
Or love
Twere all of
Your creation

Each has its place
In all of time and space
Oh, but hold not long
On any one thing
But gaze instead
On its creator and king

For tis he and he alone
Who is worth everything
Not bride nor brother
Nor any other
Can give so fully as he

For tis he who loves
So perfectly
And if he is good
Will he not also give
Such gifts
And desires
That will bring us closer

To Him who is able
To give this and more
May we always
Long for and only
Adore

-Joshua Lee Foist

I was wide-eyed with anticipation

I was wide-eyed with anticipation
My heart did long with great expectation
For what might come of this destination
In this time of brief association

What could be
What uncharted course
Could be found upon this sea
All was possible

So soft and sweet
Was the touch
That held so much
Whom might I meet

So many prospects of fond imagination
All were candidates by some approximation
Yet I was naive in my desire
In my hope for some friendship to acquire

Too much had I staked
On this short excursion
And sunk deep
In its perversion

To give into this dream
And invest everything
On the chance
Of once found romance

Tis easier now
When removed
From its current
To see it for what it was

The desire was not in itself at fault
But rather the idea
Which I did exalt
To too high a position

I lost a sense of reality
In my flawed morality
This was my idol of satisfaction
Which could never be found
In some mere attraction

Oh how long think I
Must it be until I will see
The truth for what it really is
It remains unchanged

All the while still I am submerged
In a facade of frail diversion
Hoping to satisfy
What seems so long and void

Yet truly avoiding the matter of the heart
Its longing cannot be denied
For it is justified
From birth it has been

Yet sin has skewed its perspective
And drawn it away
To seek after a thing
A mere distraction
That brings short lived satisfaction

Oh take me away
From this endless play
From this false perception
Help me to see in truth
Its deception

Though I oft but fail
May your will in me prevail
That I may once more
Learn to adore
The Lord of the sea and sky

May I learn to glorify
Him who did love me
Amidst all my complacency
To the very end

May I seek after him
Who is both father and friend
For only he breathes life
Into that which was once dead
And gives it a hope instead

Whose foundation is secure
In that which is pure
And completely satisfies

For whether in life
One may find another
To share with it a season
There is still a reason to rejoice

For all great works once begun
Are completed in him
Who knew no sin
Yet bore it all
That we might know him
And find all we ere desire
Or hope or require
For all the ages to come
In God's one and only son

-Joshua Lee Foist

Here I slip away

Here I slip away
Amidst the passing sorrows of the day
None shall see from when I depart
Or know my return
Tis my glorious art
Of which they share no part

My heart is mine alone
I do not wish its contents to be shown
What if they did see
Perchance did catch me in my misery
Did catch me in my acts of obsession
I could not stomach their expression

What I do fear most
Is that they would see me
In my frail form
(Which alas is all too oft the norm)
That they should see my imperfections
My failings and short sighted perceptions

How I strive so hard for their praise
That they should glory in my show
And always see me so
But I care not for them to truly know
All the trials I undergo
They must not see
For fear they should think ill of me
And turn in contempt

Yet how I long for someone to know
What thoughts I feel
What sorrows I face
I wish to heaven someone
Would see it all
As plainly as I do
That somehow they might comfort me
In such toil and misery

What would it cost
To be so sincere
It is the thing I fear most
As much as I desire it
So too I retire it
For fear the pain is too great to bear
To bare one's soul
To shed one's skin
That another may be drawn in
To see it all exposed
To see it all for what it truly is

Oh come now courage
If thou wilt
And give me strength
To acknowledge my guilt
That I would not withhold
One single strand of evidence
For all is guilty
Not one bit is pure
All desire is for more
There is nothing here to adore

But if in such complete admittance
There be some hope in repentance
To wash away all the blackness that remains
Then come oh currents of cleansing
And wash me through
From within and without
Redeem me of all sin and shame
For this I ask in thy most holy and glorious name

-Joshua Lee Foist

We walk in silence

We walk in silence
Deeplessly gazing into nothingness
So we go on our way
Our eyes as glass
Reflect and refract
All encounters one might attract

So we tune out
All earthly life
And we get lost
In the mindless melodies of our misery
And we let no one in
For fear they might catch us
As we truly are within

Enchanted in our isolation
Distant from all relation
Keeping all feeling within
And all onlookers amidst our control

So we hide behind the words we type
Never engaging the thoughts that are raging
Always suppressing while keeping everyone guessing
What we truly think and feel
This is our skill
This is our mask
We wear at will

Yet you see through all the disguise
Through all the troubles and the lies
As one eludes in darkness
And is consumed by the light
So you see it all whether in day or night

Nothing is unnoticed
Nothing forgotten
All is seen
What has been
What is
And what will be
All you see
So clearly

Oh rescue me
From this prison
Capture me
Free me from these lies
And this hypocritic disguise

I long to look into your eyes
To be lost in such love
That will not criticize
For it knows all sin and shame
Its benevolence bore all blame
Though not looking with disdain
Still loving despite all pain

What fidelity is this
So costly
Yet honest as a kiss

Though many may strive and fail
This one thing will prevail
For what boundaries can defend
The love of a friend

-Joshua Lee Foist

Oh let us leave this place

Oh let us leave this place
Before we further disgrace
Our fragile imaginings

Oh to break free
To depart from
All judgments of the heart

What ease could there be
In but a sense of simplicity
All things cannot be so hard

Must it always be the climb
The seemingly unending accent
Into the unknown

Where future things
Are said to be much more
Greater than before

Yet to toil and tread
Through this muck and mire
All for this one desire

For from earth we are fed
And to earth we are dead
As in its form we were born
Yet still we morn at the loss

Ah so trivial these trials
Yet they consume so much
Too much do we engage them

How long must it be
Will we one day see
Will we one day be free

One hopes it to be true
That there is hope
For me and you

I know that it is
Though some days
I feel it not

Though I know I aught
My faith is wrought with worry
And my thoughts oft but scurry

Where shall we be
In a moment or three
I cannot tell

All remains to me
A splendid mystery
And I wallow once more
In misery

For at least
Its faithful form
Seems company

To a troubled mind
A little more
Is hardly a chore

Still somewhere amidst the pain
There is still hope
And a longing of such things to remain

Perchance in time
We will be (as we believe)
Taken from this place

Yet who can know
What trials we must endure
Until then

-Joshua Lee Foist

When to stand

When to stand
And when to stand still
There is the conflict
That will battle within
To engage without
Or in

Where must all this lead
This longing, this plead
A heart that burns
A soul that yearns

For what

What lies outside
This cold existence
Who can know the jagged edges
Of this throbbing heart

Can one engage in its beating
These short shallow breaths
This air receding
This light amid the eyes
Diminishing

Will it be quenched
This flame
Once so ferocious
It burns
Though hardly visible
It longs to grow

But it does not remember
How once
The kindling that then caught its course
Has now near lost its life force

These burdens bare deep
Their callous consumes
What senses did remain
Now all grows distant
But this pain
Which seems the only kin
That comforts within

Oh to break free
Of these chains
These cords that
Dig in
And hold one fast

Oh to cast
All to the wind
Come fly away
Oh friend

All cast away
The night to the day
Where all is caught up
Between the dawn
And the gray

Light and dark
Fade away
In a sea
Of endless day

Where color once grew
So free
Now night
Has caught thee
In its grip

It's shadows
Cast across
Thy pigment
To shade all that remains

Can one be reborn
Into a new morn
Where the slate is washed clean
And no more is what had been

Oh for such a day
When one could
Toss away
All tarnished existence

And live
Live
And be loved
Loved completely

At times its thought
Too wonderful for words
But it lives
Oh it lives
And longs to be free

To be caught up with thee
For all eternity
Oh to never flee
This moment
May it ever be

Its warmth
Engages all senses
And wraps round
All defenses

It will not be ignored
It will not be tamed
For it doth not know how
For love is its character
Every fiber of its being
Is this

So come oh love
Not quietly
But with all joy
Amidst all anguish and sorrow
And carry me upon thy wings
And never let go

Though I may
Near but succumb
To doubt and fear
May they not reside here

May only thy love
Embrace
And cast out
All fear and doubt
With thy mercy and grace

-Joshua Lee Foist

Ah, for a moment I was lost in a distant daydream

Ah, for a moment I was lost in a distant daydream
The world before me, was not as it seemed to be
There was something most pleasant and alluring
Beckoning, drawing me towards it

But I could not see it clearly
It was more of a feeling which entangled me
Warmth, soft cool breeze
Gently caressing my skin
And drawing me in

To feel it's touch
Upon my face
So soothingly soft and still
Oh, to be caught up in this thrill

As awakening for the first time
To the break of day
The coolness of the early morn
In which a new day is born

All is fresh and new
The earth smells so sweet
As it discharges its dew
Oh, to drink in this view

As though times passing
Were as tender as the waves at sea
How they flock around me
And soar out from the shore
And return much stronger
Than before

They toss, and turn
They bubble and break
And slither softly and slowly to shore
Once more to cleanse
And wash away
And carry off to sea
These dregs of debris

-Joshua Lee Foist

So I sit here silently and still

So I sit here silently and still
Lacking much in heart and thrill
Our company is mixed
My eyes are fixed
On a point on the wall
Caring very little at all
For the atmosphere around
So I sit and stare
And perhaps hear a sound
But none can compare
To this somber sentiment

I play a roll
And hold a rank
And raise my glass
And take a drink
Once was I fond of it here
Once I think

But now
Less fond I feel
And more a fraud
It is perhaps somewhat odd
That I did once love it here
How very queer
Twas once quaint and charming
Yet not so now

I begin to see another path
Not far from here
A future not so far ahead
And I oft but wonder
Where it will lead

I am too much caught up in
My desires and my sin
That I let them shut me in
And all the world out
Alas I seem to doubt
What life was once
All about

At times all strength is gone
I care not to sing its song
For sorrow doth carry on
And what little joy may prolong
There are but a few drops left
To quench my calm

So all is quiet
And I once again engage the darkness
Though it is cold and dismal
It holds the comfort of solitude
Where I can cast away the world
For an hour or a day

And none may look in
While I rage and wrench
Within my ravaging sin
Here are no kin
Just me and it
I covet it
This crazed thing
But it doth no joy to me bring

All satisfaction is gone
And only the addict
A mere shard of humanity remains
Searching for but a few scraps
Of that once initial fix

But it hath stolen
His soul
And taken control
It plays the whore
That craves for more
And sucks as a sycophant
Till it seizes the last exhalation of life

And as it draws its last gleam of life
It ponders on its path and plight
How once it did delight
In all of life
Till it gave its soul
To the sorcerer's control
And never regained
Its personal role
All was lost
And such a cost

Oh that wisdom's plead
Would somehow bleed
A little life once more
Into this tortured existence
That perchance
This pilgrim
Might journey
Out from this shroud of existence
And into a life of meaning
Where hopes and longings are fulfilled
In the heart and hand of the one who willed
That all space and time should be stilled
As He saw fit
While all the world
In His craftsmanship were knit
To make such a thing of it
That He would
Give so much
To a race that cared so little
For its Creator
And King
He would give it all
Though it would cost Him everything
That they may one day return
To that which their hearts
Did once burn

-Joshua Lee Foist

Now to spring

Now to spring
That doth bring
Everything

Everything new
All that had been
Has past

And now
Comes the new
The beginning

It is here
Now
It is growing

All around
Is life
Beginning
Anew

For the first time
The song is sung
Yes spring has begun

And it welcomes
Everyone
To come

Come share in this joy
Come and be a part
Of this splendid art

Now to the new
Take it in
Breath it in

It is glorious
And wonderful
It is fresh and full

So much here
One is overwhelmed in it
Caught up in a fit of wundermeant

Oh what beauty
What virgin grace
There is in this place

So tender
And free
Oh to be

To be caught up too
In this wondrous view
Here all things are new

Everything grows
Strong
And agile

Each has its purpose and form
Each plays its part
In this work of art

It is here now
For all who come
Free to everyone

So share in the joy
Share in the fun
Now's the time for living

Free and full
Within the joy
Of life's simple pleasures

Here lies the joys of spring
And with it
Everything

For it is a time of rebirth
When all the earth
Begins again

Where hope
Is let in
And stays a season

One is offered
A reason
To live

Hope has come to live
And walk amongst us for a time
To share with us a hope that may come

To each that would follow
To each that would share
In this

So come
And enjoy
In the hope of spring

And share in the life
It does bring
To the glory of it's king!

-Joshua Lee Foist

Oh to time that marches steadily on

Oh to time that marches steadily on
So march these days
And Seasons
And moments of time

So many things we share
In these brief bits of time
Do we know how precious
Each one
Truly is

Whether, short or long
Each one we tarry on
Do we truly know that what is here
Tomorrow will be gone
What we have glanced upon
Now move we from
To another that's just begun

We've only the one
To cherish
Now
Each in its part
Has it's measure
In this art

So tender
So troubled
Can we be
May we open wide
Our eyes
To this mystery
For though
We see
Only through
A thin glass
Alas it only holds
What it reflects
It cannot share more

So look we not so long
To the future
As if to merit
This moment now
But rather somehow
May we live these moment
Here and now
And so set a course
Toward what may be
Our future days

But may we not be caught in
Its gaze
Or sing so oft of it's feeble praise
These are the days
These are the days
In which we live

So may we measure them
By what we give
Of ourselves
Each breath
Each beating heart
Is but a part
Of this glorious
Work of art

-Joshua Lee Foist

Farewell oh februare

Farewell oh februare
Twas not long ago
We did share
A moment here

How quickly the days go by
When you and I
Did think
This season would never die

Alas, another season has past
Another month is near but gone
And we look ahead
To time that marches on

Each season has it's moments
Those special surprises
Those small joys
Behind each corner

For you and I
It was a moment
Once thought I
To fly and touch the sky

Now away
We must venture
From this day
And move on
As the break of dawn
There is much ahead
Many things left unsaid

Yet still we tread
Into the waves of the unknown
As the waters engulf us
They capture this moment
Capsuled in time

So drift we on
The surface of the sea
What lies ahead
Such mystery
We cannot know

But earnestly we go
With eager longing
We look ahead
All things are possible

Who can say
Where a wave may carry us
Who can know
Where we will go from here

So may we rest
In these waves
As they carry us along
May we share in the song
Of the sea

May we sing of the days we knew
And earnestly pursue
That which lies ahead
Just beyond the shore
There lies much more
Than we ever imagined before

-Joshua Lee Foist

So distant

So distant, so desperate for quiet, from all distractions
Too much of show, too much of giving, of pretending
For what is not there, the performance must end
Some days one needs nothing but stillness
Simple sweet stillness
Release of all desires, longings and passions

So tired of being "nice" for the "niceness" of it
There are days this pleasant demeanor
Would desire to be honest, to not care what response may come
To not wait on another who is slow or seeking attention
Some days this tired soul wishes to not submit to control
Away oh false friend for truly I am more of fiend than friend
I do not care for your troubles today
I do not wish to hear your babble
I would rather shut it all out
I do not wish to smile
I do not feel the joy I fake

I wish I did not oft care so how others perceive me
To be free to fully express all things
When sad or sorrowful to be so
And not have to pretend that all is "just fine"
It is not, but I care not to hear your concern
I crave this distance this solitude

Some days to be shut up in this shroud of silence
Tis a blessed gift
Darkness hides the fears and the tears I shed
None can tell the worries I dread
They must not see

What trust can I invest in someone
For fear they will trample me afoot
And all will be in vain
What a waste
To be raped of dignity
So ragged and bear
Is there no one
Who would care

At times these prayers
Seem null and void
Why bother
Though patience
Is oft not in me
I cannot bear to wait
For long

So come assurance
Come warmth and renewal
If thou wilt
For I cannot engage in pleasantries
I beg for some understanding
For a little distant hope
A breath of peace
To give some release
Of the worries of this day

Oh carry me away
Upon the wings of the dawn
Carry me when all my strength is gone
For truly there is nothing left
But this cold existence
This beating heart
And these short shallow breaths

O come
For there is nothing left
But this passing hope
That may save
Some

-Joshua Lee Foist

Spring, so sweetly and softly snuck up on us

Spring, so sweetly and softly snuck up on us
What subtle secrets so surprisingly surface unannounced
Be not timid oh gentle blossoms
Or shy you tender trees

Life is found among these
Hope is beginning to surface
Once more
Spring is surging
Much stronger than before

What beauty lies in this vergint wood
Such brightness such depth
Such fullness of being

As though time were stilled
By this earthen birth
What joy what grace
They give this garden space

So gently they grow
They tickle this thicket
They tease as they touch
Each branch of the trees

Oh, new life is coming
The spell of winter is broken
And spring has awakened
Yes, spring has awakened
And breathes life into
Every living thing

-Joshua Lee Foist

I will no more of you

I will no more of you
Weather in or out
I am no longer about
I was drawn
As an earthly pawn
No longer
Adieu
I will no more of you

Thy costly wares
Did catch me in such stares
Such fits of rage
Oh that my mind
Could fit such a cage

This feeling is strong
Yet I cannot think on it long
It has too often cast its spell
It knows me too well
And I am undone
I know none
Can bridle
Such passion
Tis not the fashion

Ah, here is the game
Tis often played
And often lost
Its outcome has so great
A cost
The stakes far too high
Yet, purposes do lie
They do act as ally
Yet spoil with deceit
They never miss a beat

Perchance in time
One can be cast
From this crime
Yet penitence may be prolonged
If many the rights be wronged

Can the criminal be uncrimed
And the plot unwind
Oh if it were so
My heart would so swiftly go

But I fear such virtue
Would not show
To waste ones time
In the hope
Of that which they
Cannot know

So take me not within
Let me not again
Begin this discourse
I will divorce
From this deed
And with all speed
I will heed
To that discipline
Which could have saved me
From engaging in

Yet if by chance there be
A remedy
Do submit it me
I should so long
To be free
Of this wrong
That hath
A hold on me

Yea depart
Vile longing of the heart
And make thee smart
Thy exit in part
I will no more thy
Art behold
Tis too costly and cold
It hath stripped my youth
And made it old

No longer bitter shall I be
I will flee thy wits and rage
And cast off to another age
Where I might still find peace
And some release
When wrongs are made right
And all is pleasing in that sight
There shall I rest both day and night

-Joshua Lee Foist

And so I spent my Valentine's Day

And so I spent my Valentine's Day
Working away, the early hours of the morning
And though I did spend a moment of my time
With my Valentine
It was mostly in payment of a debt
To my less than tolerant government

And these are the facts
I did pay my tax
On this fourteenth day of februare
Though I doubt they did very much care
The day in which the expense was paid
But only to hear a few more coins of copper
Fall into the coffer
Did count for them
As a day well spent

Alas, I will no longer vent
For there remain a few short hours here
And I should rather enjoy them
As Well I may
That much at least they cannot take away

So shall I retire this Valentine's
Drinking deep of the joys of life
And its richest of wines

-Joshua Lee Foist

Why do I care so much

Why do I care so much
What is it in their approval
That matters
Why must such contentment
Be wrapped up in them

When has it ever been
That I was truly satisfied
In the approval of men
It is fleeting
As a vapor
Hardly felt
And before long
Is gone
And we are left to ourselves
Distant, desperate, and despairing

Your silence is cold
Your eyes are frozen
In contempt
They tear through my veins
Their poison remains
It lingers awhile
How it has overcome
And so I am undone

Joy is released
And replaced
With sorrow
That aches
It taunts
It teases
It tortures
This tender soul

How it mocks
And muses
It refuses to relinquish
Until it is drunk
On the despair
It brings to its victims

Why must it be so
Why does such hatred exist
What misfortune
Did bring one to such a place
To lose all love of life
And fall from such grace

Though I have allowed it
Some residence here
To steal my joy
I do not employ its benefit
But rather pity
Its pain
I pray it will not remain

But I shall flee
This trap
It shall not engage me long
Soon will I burst forth
With song
And return to the joy I once knew
That love I did so eagerly pursue

With all purpose and zeal
I will pursue it
I will not hold back
Nor be overcome
With doubts
Of anyone

This is my most earnest desire
That I may live to inspire
Every breath that I breathe
Every impulse I engage
Would be for this one single purpose
To glory in the one
I most dearly love
And seek only this approval
Though every fear is tested
And every fiber invested
It is always and only
For this one

-Joshua Lee Foist

So cynical are we

So cynical are we
Our minds are so easily
Caught up in dissatisfaction
We share not in others
Attraction or success
If it is not our own
It is meaningless

How selfish
We are so very
Much caught up in
Our own desires
Can we not rejoice
In others happiness

No, it seems this too
Is beyond us
So we shall sneer
And mock
If we are in misery
Perhaps we too
Might draw others in
To our own company
They shall despair

But we do not care
At least now
We have robbed them
Of what joy they had
And in some twisted way
We are glad

None should be so happy
As we, when we should be
All things are so temporary
Why make such a show
Of a thing
It too will pass

As we sip from our glass
We strive to forget
Our troubles
If but a moment
Our heartache may cease
Perhaps then
We shall find peace

But this moment too will fade
And all our energy
Will be spent
As we make our descent
Even deeper into despair

Why do we so often linger here
Do we truly desire this company
Do we cherish this feeling
This moment of solitude
And loneliness
All seem so
Very distant

There was once a time
When we did long
For so many things
We did hope
And dream
We believed
Most anything

Anything seemed possible
Then...
When our sphere of safety
Rested secure
But when that thing was pierced
And the nucleus
Of our dreams was shattered
Then...
Nothing mattered

So we wandered
In exile
And denial
We lost all memory
And recognition
Of those days
The pain was too
Severe
We did not
Go near

For fear
We should be
Struck down again
Such a thing
We could not
Endure
Again

So now, how we become
So jaded
We hate, everyone
And those who
Say they are happy
And laugh at the days to come
We think, how dumb
Are they
They too will pass away

How naive
They often seem
Yet, somehow
There is something there
Some innocence
We covet
And we shall have none
Of it
We should wish
To snatch
What little joy they have
From them

No one should be so
Fortunate
For even a moment
They shall not remain so
For long
Only time and trouble
Will ravage them
Of youth

For the folly of man
Is born with it
Scarred from birth
Doomed to die
To hate
All that is pure
For it will never be
In and of itself

Once was there a chance of it
But man did follow his own desire
His pride, did trip him
And he fell from its wire

Now as he does retire
To the mud and the mire
He sees no way
He may
Rid himself
Of this waste
And wrong

Night and day
He does pray
To the gods
Of his lineage
But none answer him

But there is one
From long ago
Who did share
Company with his kin
Before madness
Did drive them
To sin

Twas he
Who did enter in
To this world
To reclaim
Humanity
And take the blame
For their
Profanity

If only
A remnant
Would remain
And follow
They should gain
Restoration
From this
Stain

But not without a cost
To this redeemer
Would it require
He must
Plunge beneath
The murk and mire
Into the pit of hell
To dispel
All the sins
Of humanity

But he would do it willingly
That a few may find
Hope, and rest
In him
That they would be
Restored
And rejoice once more
In the hope of all humanity

-Joshua Lee Foist

With an evening in view

With an evening in view
I am oft but perplexed of what to do
There are many choices lain
before me
Though the "right" decision plain
It is not oft my habit to choose

What can I stand to lose
If a wallow about
And sing the blues
Or if so preoccupied
Catch a bit of the news

There's oft but much to distract
From what should be done
But what's the fun
In what is proper and plain

What does one gain
Or lose if to abstain
From the norm
Of reason and right

I think I'll stay in tonight
Ah, such a fright
I might go out tonight
This paper's not due
Till noon
Why not check out the latest tune
At the club

Yes, youth will oft try to so inspire us
We've all the time we need
So serious lead
These academic folk
They can't take a joke

Too much of books and brains
Can lose all sense of fun
They know none
Of the scene
Beyond the library
And coffee shop

Yet, as I dream away
The remaining hours
I pray
That perchance these
Evening showers
Might turn to ice
And delay what work is due
Another day

So is the "unselfish" prayer
Of one who wishes for
But a few hours more
Of sweet pleasant rest
And this no jest
Tis for all he'd care

But an extra moment here or there
To call his own
Snuggled safe and soundly
In the pleasant comfort and warmth
Of home

-Joshua Lee Foist

Here I sit in wondermeant

Here I sit in wondermeant
As I contemplate
What things may lie ahead

I cannot say
What a day may hold
Or an hour
Or a moment
Will unfold

Yet still
As I gaze out
From my window pane
I gain a sense
Of what could be
And what might be
Or in some sense
Should be

The future lies before us
And we are much amazed by it
For at times as though all time
Stood still
And we had but the will
To turn things as we'd see fit
If for but a moment of it

To get the stuff
Deep down inside
Underneath
And take it with us
To spread a little here
Or a little there

Oh what we could do with time
If we had but a moment with it
To do as we'd see fit

Yet though it is outside our control
We still have the wisdom
And foresight
To plan what course
We may so desire

And even still
We hearken not to our own will
But to one much greater than ourselves
For this one knows the very motives
That lie behind each choice
It is this one that did call
All into existence with
A loud and glorious voice

So as I gaze out into
These future days
And ponder
And amaze
At what might be
May I seek the council
Of one who has made
Each and every one

For with such wisdom as this
One might even privilege
At a glimpse of what lies beyond
The ocean and mountains of this place
And might for but a moment
See into the gardens and fountains
Of that country that lies
But a distance of space and time
From our own

And if one is so privy
May they not look with envy
But joyous delight
Upon that which surely will be
In the future one day they will see
All that should be
When all is made right
And pleasing
In the great creator's sight

For it is he who determines what shall be
Whether a storm or a calm at sea
Though to our kind
It is a mystery
Such a thing he holds in his hand
And beckons at his command

Indeed one day
All will stand
In his presence
Those both good and evil
Will kneel
In that place
And he shall call
All who are his own
To come home
And all those unrepentant
Of sin
He shall deny them in

But yet still
While the future lies ahead
May we be fed
On the words
Of that great one's own son
May we indeed all come
Everyone
Who are heavy laden
And come find our rest
In him who gave his life
To end all our wandering and strife
That we might find new life in him
Who has called us kin

Indeed may we
Repent of our sin
And enter in
To such fellowship
In that place
Which lies beyond
The senses
Of this place

And may we
In these few remaining days ahead
With all passion and zeal
Live such a life
That would inspire
And point toward
That one
That indeed
All would come
And be freed
From sin
May they long
For him
And him alone
Who calls each one
To come home

-Joshua Lee Foist

We do as we like

We do as we like
We say what we wish
We are quite selfish
And we do not care
Indeed it seems
This is the world in which we live

We give little attention to others
We care much less for our sisters
and brothers
Life is career, is cash
We want it all
We want our own
Separate stash

A piece of the action
On our terms
We want to make a statement
We like to offend
We cast our morals
To the wind

Our way is right
We pick a fight
We make our demands
We delight
In the fate which
We deem to rest
In our own hands

We are flippant
We are foul
And there's no end in sight
This is our right
So is the world in which we live

What is right and wrong
But a point of view
Which so easily
Can be overlooked
What is right for you
Is fine
So long as it doesn't
Conflict with my time

What are we trying to prove
What are we rebelling against
In all things we glory in
If there is truly no sin
Then why do we still feel
A since of shame
As if somehow deep down
We are to blame

Is there still some truth to be found
Is there some standard that remains
Unchanged and uninfected
Or is all lost to the wind

As the teacher once wrote
All is meaningless
A chasing after the wind
So are all things
Under the sun

No submission
Have we but one
We answer to none
But our desires
And they too
Begin to lose attraction

All passions
Begin to lose their flame
At last we remain
Stripped bear
And who is to blame
We are abandoned
And unloved
At last we begin to feel
The reflection
Of our own
Infection

We are sick
And dying
And there is no denying
So now we await
Our glorious end

So naked and cold
So we shall behold
Our so long awaited end
Without hope
Or friend
All is wasted
All is meaningless

Yet still
Outside
This abandoned place
There stands
A trace
Of hope

Truth remains
It still pleads
Forgives
It can wash away
The most confused
And afflicted
The most rejected
And convicted

It can heal the most
Vile of disease
It only requires
The bowing of will
And the bending of knees

All it asks
Is full acceptance
And allegiance
To confess
With all humility
That one has
No ability
Apart from
The truth
To save themselves
Indeed all is meaningless
Under the sun
For only the Son
Can set one free

-Joshua Lee Foist

So what is there really

So what is there really
In this business of relationships
Some we happen upon
Others we initiate
For our own devices

We love
We hate
Such adventure
Such struggle
In debate

We do not hesitate
We infatuate
Upon what might be
Ideal

Perfection
In every collection
We make for ourselves

We lead such perfectly
Shallow lives
We torture
Our minds over
Fine things

Fine wines
A pleasant picture
A colorful drape
A superb fate
We can hardly
Appreciate

If only today
We muse
Perhaps
They'll come my way

It most certainly
Must be today
Something in the air
I said the perfect prayer
My favorite song just played
And this all not by accident

Romance we seek
At least once or twice
A week

Are we so shallow
Must we always
Be entertained
By such
Petty things

Sure they are fine
In their own kind
But they do not
Fulfill
As such a heart
We long
Could
Thrill

Surely it will in time
With just a precise
Measure
A little fond
Indulgence
Of a certain
Pleasure

It must be so
I just know
Mustn't it
Be so

Perhaps I do not know
Oh, how very sad
Have I truly
Thought
I could buy such a thing
With such a pleasant
Gesture
Or a pretty ring

It takes more of character
And commitment
Of trust
To build
Just
Such a thing

But in time
I believe
Such a thing
Could blossom
Into such a flower
True love
Is awakened
In such an hour

-Joshua Lee Foist

This wind around me

This wind around me
How it toils and it grows
It blows wherever it goes
It takes with it whatever it will
It gathers and scatters

To remain in this place
To not be caught up with it
It takes much purpose
Much conviction
Such a foundation
Is hard to find

Too often
It is easy to be caught up with it
There is pleasure for a moment
To feel the breath of life
As one is caught up in its currents

But when its course is run
And the winds have changed
All is rearranged
Yet still we remain
Lost, without direction
And full of pain
In this, what did we gain

True a lesson was found
In this present purpose bound
But have we the skill to gain
The wisdom in the pain
Or will we again
Be caught up in
These gusts of wind

Who can know when they
Shall return
Either we can burn
With passion
Or yearn to grow
To learn to know

How to build a foundation
That will not yield
To such intoxication
It will remain steadfast
Till the very last
Breeze has blown

While all others
Are scattered
Here we find shelter
In this unshifting sand
For it is stronger
Than that which is made by hand

This rock, this cornerstone
Before all others were known
Its purpose was shown
Its plan would shelter
Would save......man

For those who would seek it
And cling to its foundation
And not be scattered
Or shattered by it
Would find its worth
In this one that came to earth

For in time
When the currents grow
And the winds blow
When the heavens quake
And the earth shakes

Then will all creation
Desire this firm foundation
But they will be scattered
Shattered by its force
No earthly thing can stop its course
Its source of power is not of this earth

So while still this eye of the storm remains
May all creation cease to be amazed
By such earthly desires
And come to trust in that
Which remains sure and steady
May all come ready
To receive this assurance
Found in this rock
Which shall not be moved

May they seek it earnestly
And humbly
Not for what can be gained by it
But what can be found in it
Without it none shall live
It requires all one can give
And more
It desires full control
One must give full allegiance
With heart, and hand, and soul

But what is received is beyond all
Imagination
Nothing more can be desired
For from this rock flows
The springs of eternal life
And with it all longings
Are fulfilled in this
Rock of Ages

-Joshua Lee Foist