Farewell oh februare

Farewell oh februare
Twas not long ago
We did share
A moment here

How quickly the days go by
When you and I
Did think
This season would never die

Alas, another season has past
Another month is near but gone
And we look ahead
To time that marches on

Each season has it's moments
Those special surprises
Those small joys
Behind each corner

For you and I
It was a moment
Once thought I
To fly and touch the sky

Now away
We must venture
From this day
And move on
As the break of dawn
There is much ahead
Many things left unsaid

Yet still we tread
Into the waves of the unknown
As the waters engulf us
They capture this moment
Capsuled in time

So drift we on
The surface of the sea
What lies ahead
Such mystery
We cannot know

But earnestly we go
With eager longing
We look ahead
All things are possible

Who can say
Where a wave may carry us
Who can know
Where we will go from here

So may we rest
In these waves
As they carry us along
May we share in the song
Of the sea

May we sing of the days we knew
And earnestly pursue
That which lies ahead
Just beyond the shore
There lies much more
Than we ever imagined before

-Joshua Lee Foist

So distant

So distant, so desperate for quiet, from all distractions
Too much of show, too much of giving, of pretending
For what is not there, the performance must end
Some days one needs nothing but stillness
Simple sweet stillness
Release of all desires, longings and passions

So tired of being "nice" for the "niceness" of it
There are days this pleasant demeanor
Would desire to be honest, to not care what response may come
To not wait on another who is slow or seeking attention
Some days this tired soul wishes to not submit to control
Away oh false friend for truly I am more of fiend than friend
I do not care for your troubles today
I do not wish to hear your babble
I would rather shut it all out
I do not wish to smile
I do not feel the joy I fake

I wish I did not oft care so how others perceive me
To be free to fully express all things
When sad or sorrowful to be so
And not have to pretend that all is "just fine"
It is not, but I care not to hear your concern
I crave this distance this solitude

Some days to be shut up in this shroud of silence
Tis a blessed gift
Darkness hides the fears and the tears I shed
None can tell the worries I dread
They must not see

What trust can I invest in someone
For fear they will trample me afoot
And all will be in vain
What a waste
To be raped of dignity
So ragged and bear
Is there no one
Who would care

At times these prayers
Seem null and void
Why bother
Though patience
Is oft not in me
I cannot bear to wait
For long

So come assurance
Come warmth and renewal
If thou wilt
For I cannot engage in pleasantries
I beg for some understanding
For a little distant hope
A breath of peace
To give some release
Of the worries of this day

Oh carry me away
Upon the wings of the dawn
Carry me when all my strength is gone
For truly there is nothing left
But this cold existence
This beating heart
And these short shallow breaths

O come
For there is nothing left
But this passing hope
That may save
Some

-Joshua Lee Foist

Spring, so sweetly and softly snuck up on us

Spring, so sweetly and softly snuck up on us
What subtle secrets so surprisingly surface unannounced
Be not timid oh gentle blossoms
Or shy you tender trees

Life is found among these
Hope is beginning to surface
Once more
Spring is surging
Much stronger than before

What beauty lies in this vergint wood
Such brightness such depth
Such fullness of being

As though time were stilled
By this earthen birth
What joy what grace
They give this garden space

So gently they grow
They tickle this thicket
They tease as they touch
Each branch of the trees

Oh, new life is coming
The spell of winter is broken
And spring has awakened
Yes, spring has awakened
And breathes life into
Every living thing

-Joshua Lee Foist

I will no more of you

I will no more of you
Weather in or out
I am no longer about
I was drawn
As an earthly pawn
No longer
Adieu
I will no more of you

Thy costly wares
Did catch me in such stares
Such fits of rage
Oh that my mind
Could fit such a cage

This feeling is strong
Yet I cannot think on it long
It has too often cast its spell
It knows me too well
And I am undone
I know none
Can bridle
Such passion
Tis not the fashion

Ah, here is the game
Tis often played
And often lost
Its outcome has so great
A cost
The stakes far too high
Yet, purposes do lie
They do act as ally
Yet spoil with deceit
They never miss a beat

Perchance in time
One can be cast
From this crime
Yet penitence may be prolonged
If many the rights be wronged

Can the criminal be uncrimed
And the plot unwind
Oh if it were so
My heart would so swiftly go

But I fear such virtue
Would not show
To waste ones time
In the hope
Of that which they
Cannot know

So take me not within
Let me not again
Begin this discourse
I will divorce
From this deed
And with all speed
I will heed
To that discipline
Which could have saved me
From engaging in

Yet if by chance there be
A remedy
Do submit it me
I should so long
To be free
Of this wrong
That hath
A hold on me

Yea depart
Vile longing of the heart
And make thee smart
Thy exit in part
I will no more thy
Art behold
Tis too costly and cold
It hath stripped my youth
And made it old

No longer bitter shall I be
I will flee thy wits and rage
And cast off to another age
Where I might still find peace
And some release
When wrongs are made right
And all is pleasing in that sight
There shall I rest both day and night

-Joshua Lee Foist

And so I spent my Valentine's Day

And so I spent my Valentine's Day
Working away, the early hours of the morning
And though I did spend a moment of my time
With my Valentine
It was mostly in payment of a debt
To my less than tolerant government

And these are the facts
I did pay my tax
On this fourteenth day of februare
Though I doubt they did very much care
The day in which the expense was paid
But only to hear a few more coins of copper
Fall into the coffer
Did count for them
As a day well spent

Alas, I will no longer vent
For there remain a few short hours here
And I should rather enjoy them
As Well I may
That much at least they cannot take away

So shall I retire this Valentine's
Drinking deep of the joys of life
And its richest of wines

-Joshua Lee Foist

Why do I care so much

Why do I care so much
What is it in their approval
That matters
Why must such contentment
Be wrapped up in them

When has it ever been
That I was truly satisfied
In the approval of men
It is fleeting
As a vapor
Hardly felt
And before long
Is gone
And we are left to ourselves
Distant, desperate, and despairing

Your silence is cold
Your eyes are frozen
In contempt
They tear through my veins
Their poison remains
It lingers awhile
How it has overcome
And so I am undone

Joy is released
And replaced
With sorrow
That aches
It taunts
It teases
It tortures
This tender soul

How it mocks
And muses
It refuses to relinquish
Until it is drunk
On the despair
It brings to its victims

Why must it be so
Why does such hatred exist
What misfortune
Did bring one to such a place
To lose all love of life
And fall from such grace

Though I have allowed it
Some residence here
To steal my joy
I do not employ its benefit
But rather pity
Its pain
I pray it will not remain

But I shall flee
This trap
It shall not engage me long
Soon will I burst forth
With song
And return to the joy I once knew
That love I did so eagerly pursue

With all purpose and zeal
I will pursue it
I will not hold back
Nor be overcome
With doubts
Of anyone

This is my most earnest desire
That I may live to inspire
Every breath that I breathe
Every impulse I engage
Would be for this one single purpose
To glory in the one
I most dearly love
And seek only this approval
Though every fear is tested
And every fiber invested
It is always and only
For this one

-Joshua Lee Foist