How long has it been

How long has it been
Since we last were as kin
What drew me from you
What was so great a thing that
I should pursue
Anything but you

Twas sin in me I knew
Though at that time
I would not confess
Only did I find loneliness
And it did not satisfy
It was a lie

So ran I to the wind
With my inheritance I ran
As a thief as fast as he can
I fled from my friend
I betrayed
When I should have stayed
Instead I sought another
To give me what I thought
I desired

But no joy did I truly find
Only this one cost
I was truly lost
Drunk on this poison
How it gripped me inside
It tortured it lied

It told me all I wanted to hear
But somehow doubt and fear
They too were near
I was tightly bound
In it's grip
I could not break free
I had succumb
To this serpent

And in the deepest darkness
I cried
Save me
If ever I needed thee
Tis now
Release me
For I have run
To that which was sin
I drank deep
And called it kin
And it took me in
It robbed me
Of all dignity

And I am abandoned
Stripped bare and bleeding
Left for dead
No one will look upon me
Only to spit
Or jeer

Will you take me in
For once were we kin
And then my sin
I am nothing
Defiled and despised
There is no one else
But you
Would you take me in

And as I draw my last
breath to cry
I see one
Who is more disfigured
Than I
For me
Did he die
When I ran to my sin
With all my lusts
I rushed in
To crucify
He who truly
Loved

Yet He did it willingly
That I might know
The depth of His mercy
And forgiveness
No one else
Can love
As this
For only He
Brings joy
And satisfies
All loneliness

So now I cast
All others aside
And look to Him
Who died
And rose
He gave all for my sin
And now through
His stripes
Am I healed
In his blood
Am I sealed
Now we are
Kin
Only He
And He alone
Can save
All
From sin

-Joshua Lee Foist

I am too much overcome with thee

I am too much overcome with thee
It seems to be no mystery
Yet still find I misery
For all my hope rests on thee
It should not be

I have lost my love
For the one above
All others
There is no one
To compare
To such depth of love
All longing is fulfilled
In that one
Who gave all
For those who denied
For these He died
Still I am mesmerized
At times amidst such extravagance
I still lack confidence
In Him who can only love

So lost am I in my own desires
Such worthless treasures I require
Yet these fade and still sorrow
Evades such joy (I once knew)
Such longing did I pursue
Yet where are You
Oh where can You be found

And then I turn to find
Always here You are
Tis blindness hath faded You
From my view
Still always You are here
I cannot escape Your love
No, you remain
When all others have fled
You remain instead

What undeserved love is this
I know not how to repay it
For I a thief
Have stolen away
A mere counterfeit
And it has come to nothing
I wallow in my despair
Yet still steadfast
You are here
To seek and repair
Such brokenness
I cannot fathom
You are my only hope

So may I seek that which is good
As I should long for such things
May I deny all other worthless things
Only this can satisfy all longings
Whether a broken love can ever be found
In you its purpose is bound
If all this life
All have I You
It will surely do
And more
It will be true
For only need I
You
You are all that I require
No earthly portion
Could ever compare
So give up I
My despair
And seek only that
Which is most fair
This is my prayer

It is enough
I am overcome
With thoughts of this one
And at last
Have I found
My one desire
Tis lost in love
For You
All things have become new
And now tis only You
That I pursue

-Joshua Lee Foist

Be still oh beating heart within me

Be still oh beating heart within me
That beats so often for itself
So little does it care of anyone else
But be soft, be still, as best you may
That I may pause to reflect and pray this day

What noise is this in my head
By which all doubts and fears are fed
Your cries so loud within me
They torture me in this shroud
Oh that I could break free and meet with thee

Will you loose my chains
Will you guide me through this maze
How these past nights and days
I wander, though as I do
I pray that I might meet with you

Always you, may it ever be
May I cast aside all other things
That keep me from your love
For nothing else is there which satisfies
Nothing else is so steadfast

You keep this course with me
Though I cannot see where it leads
Only to rest in your arms when my strength is gone
And to carry on, where ere this journey may lead
So, with all speed may we steady on

For what can hold us back
When fear is calmed as the storms at sea
We will pass through this mystery
Together we shall eagerly behold
That which once we could not see
Now transcends all time and space

We have found company in this place
But to rest in His unchanging grace
Tis all we need
As we cast all other things aside
For in Him alone we abide

-Joshua Lee Foist

So here I stand and wonder

So here I stand and wonder
Is all of life a plunder
Are we slowly sinking under
Far down as we go - we go
Who can know what there is beneath
What earth or water in the deep

All grows pale
So dark and cold
We sink lower still
Our hearts chill
As we are pulled farther down below

Oh this desolate place
Where breath is all that warms our face
There is nothing else to cling too
But hand, and heart, and you

Surely, we will get through
Surely, we will pass through
To the sea where everything must be
Where hope and longing and harmony
There is warmth in that ocean
It soothes like a potion
We long with devotion
To go to that place

Without a trace of where we've been
Always longing to be in
The midst of it
Surrounded in this place
What sweet heavenly grace
We see much
How our hearts burn
And our thoughts turn
To that which we most desire

So let we retire
Here awhile
Let all become quiet
And may we have peace
So sweet and pleasant
May calm our every nerve

With one breath
We breathe as one
We unite
What joy
Delight
At last

-Joshua Lee Foist

And What of November

And What of November
Will we ere remember
When the days are done
And the mind is numb
Will we remember it's sum
Or do we look to none but the days ahead

And what of them when they too are dead
What of them will be said
Must we always look ahead
And forget on what ground we tread

What is such a day
Do we keep it at bay
Or do we simply lose it to tomorrow
And away, we look on to the next day

Always moving
Never looking back
To reflect or perfect
We move without a thought in retrospect

Tis all the days while we are young
We neglect the sum
For we care not much for any one
Simply what ere may seem fun
We think none
Then all are done
Still too we are dumb

In time, it will catch us
We will not always our youth
For time is its proof
Its test of our wit
Oh had we the strength to handle it

Oh that we'd have lingered
A moment here
I fear we might have learned a thing
But what use now do these cold hands bring
Is there worth in them for any thing

Perhaps still there is but chance to will
If we will but linger still
While we but have a little strength to bear
Tis all we have while there's still time

Looking on it does
To see how we have come along
To see if we have learned how
when we are weak to become strong

Only in faith outside of ourselves
Do we find such hope to carry on
May we seek it always
While still here it remains
Or else we lose it all
When it is gone

So leave we the days that we remember
Those days of November
That once were here
And now are gone
May we reflect on them too
Before they fade from view
For once have we November
And then only we remember
For then all is gone

-Joshua Lee Foist